• CRAFTY WEE BASTARDS

    Short stories from being a wee bastard in Glasgow. Some of the characters names are false, but the stories are true. I hope you enjoy reading these as much as I enjoyed writing them. --/ alessio./

Making Friends With Tramps

He was our ET. Like Billy and Gizmo, we kept him a secret from the government. Like Chunk and Sloth, we cared for him when no one else did. Like The Henderson’s┬áBig Foot, he was hairy and smelled of pish. Children’s movies of the 80′s were responsible for inspiring children all over the world to … Continue reading

Getting Caught: Wee Dicks Playing In Construction Sites

“I’m gonna take a shit down this pipe,” said Tom*. “Cool!” I replied.And so I watched my friend squat over the already fitted mains water pipe for the planned kitchen of the construction site we were trespassing in. It was going to be a good summer. Throughout my childhood, Tom would be my on/off friend, … Continue reading

Going to Town: An Argyle Street Mugging

Glasgow in the 90′s: As kids, we were pretty much free to roam our neighbourhoods. One of our limitations was the city centre. Under no circumstances were we to go into town. The first time I went into town without my parents knowing, I had only enough money to buy a return ticket on the … Continue reading

Scams at 6: Entry Level Criminal Activity

I was 6 years old when I learnt how to make my own pocket money. My mother just had her second child and we had recently moved to Laurence Street (just off Byres road) along with my mother’s new boyfriend, now step-father. It was the second home I could remember, before that it was just … Continue reading

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